


As Tears Go By

by brianjones



Category: The Rolling Stones
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-06
Updated: 2015-07-06
Packaged: 2018-04-07 22:52:12
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,165
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4280943
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/brianjones/pseuds/brianjones
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Keith is in love with Brian, but so is Mick. Brian doesn't care. As Tears Go By is written.</p>
            </blockquote>





	As Tears Go By

**Author's Note:**

> This fanfiction is based off the claim in a new biography about Mick Jagger which states he seduced Brian Jones as a “sexual powerplay” against Keith Richards, which also claims Anita Pallenberg said Brian told her ended with Mick “feeling emotionally raw and wondering who seduced whom.”, and that often felt left out because of the friendship Brian and Keith originally shared. All of that could very well be made up, and to my knowledge nothing in this fanfiction happened in real life. Oh yeah, and I am not affiliated with The Rolling Stones or any of the characters in this work of pure fiction, unfortunately.

Mick was an observer. He observed the way things were around him. Such as the way Brian and Keith hit it off the first time they made eye contact at the show they’d met him at; the way their handshake lingered just a little too long for strangers. He’d noticed the way Brian and Keith were in their own little world in any group situation, (or any situation, really), like they were the only two in the room. They were “Best friends”. The best of friends two people could be. With that came the inevitable pushing away of Mick. The expected, “Well, Brian and me kind of planned this one together, so we’ll probably just have this be our thing… Tag along next time, maybe?” He knew he wouldn’t tag along next time. 

“Kei-th!... Keith, no!” Brian burst out into laughter between words as he chased him around the tour bus, Keith having taken his hair brush. Keith wasn’t a fast runner, but Brian was laughing too hard to give much of a chase, (and to be fair, his short legs weren’t helping his speed either.) As Brian found his breath and caught up close enough, he gave one final leap, hooking Keith around the thighs and tackling him to the ground, with a hurricane of laughter filling the tour bus from both boys, a big CRASH sounding through the cabin. 

As Mick jumped down from his bunk and ran quickly to find the source of the sound, he stumbled to stop himself from tripping over the boys on the ground; the boys on the ground who were on top of each other, Brian hovering over Keith, his right leg tucked between both of Keith’s and their faces millimeters apart. Both of their hands were grasped around the handle of the hairbrush, their fingers intertwined and the brush in between. Neither of them spoke a word, only breathlessly smiled at each other, their mouths open and their gazes, almost longing, never moving. 

“Are you both all right?” Mick finally spoke up, since it seemed neither Keith nor Brian intended to. Brian laughed distantly and cleared his throat, rolling off to the side of Keith and doing an unconvincing job of trying to take his eyes off him. “Fine, just fine.” Keith laughed softly, sitting up and finally standing once he’d focused off the blonde. Mick helped Brian up and looked at them both, smiling softly. His concern hadn’t mattered apparently, watching as the boys brushed him off and went around him, walking shoulder to shoulder down the corridor between the bunks and into another room. 

The next day the entire band would find themselves in the recording studio, finishing up the last few songs on Out of Our Heads. Brian and Keith were on opposite sides of the room, Keith tucked back in the corner with a cigarette hanging out of his mouth as he tuned his guitar. Brian was talking to Charlie and laughing at something he’d said, gazing at Keith out of the corner of his eye. 

“I… you know, what is there to say? There must be something going on with them. They’re always together, and, well… I don’t mean to jump to conclusions, but I’ve heard things about them-.” Andrew Oldham, the producer of their album mumbled to a sound tech in the corner, a grim look on his face. “It’s just that, Keith and Brian, well they….” The whispers proved to not be quiet enough as Keith dropped his cigarette on the floor on stomped it out, setting his guitar aside and standing up abruptly. “Alright now,” he said loudly, taking a few steps forward from the chair he was sitting at, all eyes on the room now on him. “No more talking in metaphors now, no more hush hush shit talk behind our backs now, right? What do we suppose is goin’ on between me and Brian now, hmm?” 

Now everyone’s eyes fell on Brian, who was still sat next to Charlie, looking rather sheepish and embarrassed now. “I-I-nothing, Keith! Nothing!” Andrew laughed nervously, the tone of his voice resembling an unconvincing waver. “No, no, now there’s been lots of talk about something now, hasn’t there? Hasn’t there been, Brian, haven’t you heard it?” Keith asked, his voice getting more confident with each word, like he was ready to burst. Brian nodded nervously, looking between each face in the room before his eyes finally settled on Keith, still nodding. “I think all these metaphors are implying something quite extreme. Quite extreme, now. I think you’re trying to tell me, well, you all believe me and Brian are, well… me and Brian are queers!” He laughed with the last word. “Now I ain’t got a single problem with the queers, but to say two men can’t be best friends without there being something more behind it, well… well the roads obviously gotten to you lads.” Keith said simply, his mouth a straight line now. He’d obviously calmed down quite a bit, but it didn’t stop him from walking over to Brian, pulling him up quickly and charging out of the room, the blond following awkwardly.   
Mick had watched the whole thing silently, and was left there to watch Andrew pick up his brief and quickly leave the studio, looking stunned over the whole thing. Bill and Charlie walked up to him slowly, Bill clearing his throat, “Wanna go down to the pub with us, Mick? Get a drink.” Mick nodded, “Right, yeah, just give me a minute. I should go check on   
Keith and Brian.” He stood up, walking out of the studio down the hall to wherever they’d gone. 

He stopped when he heard peculiar sounds coming from an old broom closet that was normally filled with only, well, brooms. Under the crack of the door you could see the light was on. The sound that had stopped him in the first place became all too familiar once he was silently standing in his place and really bothered to listen. It was the sound of kissing. Noise leaked everywhere in the slightly dingy studio, and the sound was suddenly perfectly clear. Maybe it wasn’t Brian and Keith in there, Mick said to himself, but that was false hope. They’d gone down this exact hall, and no one else was scheduled to record today. Not only that, it was late, all the workers were off their shifts now anyway. The band were the only people left in the whole place. The slight smack of lips continued until there was a “Mh-“, before a hit against the wall sounded and bubbly but quiet laughter sounded. “Keith, be careful.” Someone, obviously Brian, had said softly before the sound of kissing continued. Mick bolted away from the door and back into the studio, Bill and Charlie raising their eyebrows at the way he’d been running. “Guys, I’m ready for that drink now.” Mick said breathlessly. 

Keith and Brian loved each other. It was obvious they were best friends. It was obvious when they demanded to be next to each other in photoshoots. It was obvious when they spent all their free time together. It was obvious when the shotgunned a cigarette, or “jokingly” held hands, or even when Keith cut Brian’s hair for him, and took a little extra time because he “just loved Brian’s hair.” It was obvious, in every sense of the word. You didn’t have to even know them to realize they were close, and they were constantly getting closer. Mick could tell. Everyone had dropped the “gay” rumors and everything was back to normal… somewhat. He wanted to ignore the way he was even more of a third wheel around them now. Tried to ignore the way Brian always somehow managed to find his way onto Keith’s lap. Tried to ignore the way they were always giggling and staring with each other. Tried to ignore the constant sounds of makeout sessions in the room next to his. But, as always, Mick had a knack for observing.

Keith and Brian, if anything, pushed Mick out even more as they seemed more and more like a couple each day.   
“Take a rain check, Mick, we only have two tickets to the movie.” Or, “Maybe next time, Mick, but the parties quite exclusive and we thought you were busy, so…”  
If it wasn’t in the studio, he hardly ever saw the two of them at all anymore. It caused a certain stir in his guts. A certain anger, or hurt, he didn’t know yet.   
As Mick lay in his bed, thinking over the concert he’d just performed and how he thought he sounded a little flat, the back of his mind was entirely focused on Brian and Keith, who were just in the next room over, sharing a bed again. He knew if he lost sleep over them again he’d be even worse at the next show, and have even deeper bags under his eyes, so he gave up trying to force them out of his mind and resorted to counting sheep.

One sheep, two sheep, three sheep- “Oh my god.”

The gasp, obviously made by Brian sounded through the wall. Is he hurt? Has he fallen? Has Keith done something? A million thoughts rushed into his head immediately before- “Oh, fuck.” a cry came. “Hush, hush.” He heard Keith immediately follow up with, with a quiet giggle and a creak of a spring in the mattress. Brian laughed too as the creaking got louder. And louder. And soon it was the head board of the bed against the wall, the light thump sounding through Mick’s headboard as well, since the beds were placed against opposite sides of the same wall. The gasps didn’t cease any time soon. Nor did the whispers, or the sound of kissing and a creaking mattress.   
They were fucking. His two best friends, in the room right next to him, fucking. And not being quiet about it either.   
Suddenly, after giving up on covering his ears and counting the sheep again, Mick realized something. He now understood what the feeling in his guts was. Jealousy.   
//  
The next morning, after Mick had got his hair into perfection and brushed his teeth, he decided to face the day with one goal; find a way to put Keith and Brian back into place. He wasn’t sure who they think they are, but they can’t just go off fucking around and ditching the band and get away with it. Not on his watch. 

He stepped out of his hotel room and walked over to the next door, Keith’s room; well, technically now Keith and Brian’s room. He barely knocked before barging in, swinging the door shut behind himself. His eyes gazed around before falling on Brian, who looked disheveled and shirtless (in fact, Mick wasn’t sure he had any clothes on at all). He looked practically glowing, gazing around the room with a sleepy expression and a smile on his face. Keith was standing at the trey of food presumably room service or Andrew had brought in. He was only in boxers and an unbuttoned shirt, a strip of bacon in his mouth. Keith slowly turned around and faced Mick, grinning sheepishly and biting off what portion of the bacon was in his mouth. “Oh, sorry mate, thought you were housekeeping.” He joked, causing Brian to look up at Mick and smile, laughing a bit. 

Mick smiled slightly, but didn’t make an effort to seem cheerful. “When did you get breakfast?”  
“Oh, this? Brian just called up room service.” Keith shrugged, “Want some?” Mick sighed and pushed himself off from where he was leaning on the door, walking further into the room. “No thanks. What did you guys get up to last night?”   
Brian shrugged and sat up, the sheets still wrapped around the bottom half of his naked form. “Nothing, really. We fell asleep quite fast, actually. We were really very tired.” He spoke softly with a slight lisp. Keith nodded in agreement and picked up a mug of coffee, bringing it to his lips and looking up at Mick, “We’ll get ready and come down to pick back up on recording with you and the other guys.” Mick sighed reluctantly and nodded, walking slowly to the door and opening it. Before he’s even out, Keith is climbing back onto the bed and over Brian. “Really very tired” my ass. 

He made his way down to the recording studio and plopped down at a chair across from Bill, staring at him intently before piping up, “Have you felt like… you know, left out? Like, by Keith and Brian, lately?” A silence lingered for a moment before Bill said, “Why, have you, then?”, never looking up from his bass.  
“Well… well, yeah, I guess I have.” Mick said slowly, as if he had to think about it, which he obviously didn’t. “Nothing’s new, Mick. They’ve always been best mates.” Bill shrugged, “They don’t seem to be acting any different to me.” He looked up at him and shrugged, gazing at Mick curiously.   
Mick sighed dramatically and rolled his eyes, standing up and walking over to lean against a piano in the corner of the room. Keith and Brian walked in just then, Brian’s striped sweater immediately recognizable. Everyone immediately got to work, with the exception of Mick, who sat glaring and self-loathing in the corner until it was his turn to record. 

A few days passed and Mick only thought more and more about the situation. Specifically, Brian; pretty, pretty Brian. It wasn’t fair that they thought they could just push Mick out of the picture, out of the friendship, leave him out. What was so special about Keith anyway? Why were they the ones who get to be best friends? Why do they get to fuck about and fall for each other and leave Mick behind like a rotting limb? They thought they could just push him aside until they needed him? Well they couldn’t. They wouldn’t, and Mick intended to show them that. And he knew how he would accomplish it. 

Keith, Charlie and Bill had gotten called into the studio to put some finishing touches on the recordings, leaving Mick and Brian alone at the hotel. Mick was in his room and Brian was down the hall in his own room instead of Keith’s, for once. Mick made sure to make himself look as desirable as possible, putting on tight pants and a button up and checking himself in the mirror a million times. He left the room with a different mission this time. 

He walked down the hall and opened Brian’s door without knocking. Brian was sitting at the end of his bed, shirtless with pajama pants low on his hips as he watched TV. He looked up at Mick and gave him a quick up and down before making eye contact and smirking, “Well look who’s all dolled up.” He teased sarcastically before returning his gaze to the television. Mick laughed light heartedly and made his was over to the bed, sitting questionably close to Brian and looking at him. “How have you been?”  
“Fine.” Brian said slowly before turning his head so he was face to face with Mick. “I’ve been fine. How about you?”  
“Alright…” Mick said unconvincingly and shrugged. He slowly got a bit of a devious look on his face, placing his hand high up on Brian’s thigh and looking at him with soft eyes. “I’ve missed you a lot, you know, really. We haven’t seen much of each other lately.”  
Brian’s eyes shifted from Mick’s hand to his face quickly, tilting his head and nodding. “Uh, yeah… I’ve missed you too, Mick, but… but we’re with each other every day.” He laughed, the tone of his voice implying confusion. 

Mick smiled and pressed his hand more firmly into his leg as he shifted, “I know, I know. I meant we haven’t been alone in a while, you know? No alone time.” His voice was full of suggestion as his hand moved higher.   
An awkward silence from Brian hung before he opened his mouth slowly, “Listen, Mick…”, but before he could get anything out he was interrupted by a desperate, “Oh, Brian.” Whine from Mick as he leaned forward and kissed Brian hard, his hand skirting up from his thigh to his chest, coming to cup his cheek as he pressed into the kiss.   
Brian’s eyes grew startled as he froze before slowly pulling back from Mick, stuttering to get words out. “Mick, Christ, what are you doing?” he screeched, leaning away from him slightly. 

“Brian, I can’t hide it anymore. Can’t you see the way I look at you, the way I drool? You’re so gorgeous, you’re so… so… so sexy.” He said, for lack of a better word. He delved in to kiss Brian again, his hand going to the back of Brian’s head. Brian slowly came out of the shock and let his eyes slip closed, kissing back and fisting into Mick’s shirt, pulling him closer and relaxing. Mick pulled away, quite reluctantly, and pushed Brian gently back by his shoulders, putting a knee on each side of his hips and sitting down on his waistband, balancing himself by placing his hands on Brian’s chest and leaning forward, looking down at him. “I get so jealous when I see you and Keith together, when I hear you two fucking in the next room.” He gritted, taking all of the body underneath him in with his eyes before leaning down and kissing Brian. Slowly he moved past his lips to his neck, pressing small kisses down the side of it. “He can’t do anything for you. He has nothing to offer you, Brian, not for people like you. Not for people like us.”   
Brian shot him a questioning glare before Mick pressed himself fully against Brian’s package, causing his face to go limp and his mouth to fall open with a silent groan, his hands coming up to Mick’s hips and squeezing. 

Mick pressed a final kiss to his collarbone before sitting up again, putting more weight on Brian. “He doesn’t know how to please you because he’s only ever been with women. I know how to, because we’re the same, you and me. I have actual experience with people like us.”  
“What do you mean by that?” Brian asked, “People like us? People, like…. People as in… queers?” he said hesitantly and gave Mick a nervous look.   
Without an answer, the look they gave each other spoke for itself, saying that was surely what Mick meant.

Soon enough clothes were flung off bodies and bodies were pushed together, writhing and moving and grabbing and thrusting, and just like that Mick was throwing his clothes back on and leaving a sleeping Brian under the covers naked, dashing out quickly before Keith, or anyone else for that matter, got back. 

Mick didn’t risk the chance of talking to Brian or Keith before he left for the studio, leaving without them and quickly making his way there. Keith was 20 minutes late by the time he burst through the doors and into the room, Brian biting his nails and trudging nervously behind him. He gave a quick scan of the room before his rage filled expression landed on his clear target, Mick. Without a minutes pause he stormed over to him, fist clenched as he swung at Mick with no hesitation, punching him square in the jaw with a yell of, “You god damn cunt!” Everyone jerked up and out of their seats, everyone gasping and watching the scene unfold. Mick clutched his jaw and looked up at Keith. It was a bad punch. A hard punch, hard enough to knock him back and definitely hurt, but a weak punch. Keith’s expression was now filled with misery, tears welling in his eyes and his breathing heavy. “I hate you! I hate you, you stupid fucker! How could you do something like this to me? I hate you!” He screamed, his voice cracking and breaking with tears, Brian practically shaking behind him. 

Keith stuttered to find words for a bit before giving up and turning around, grabbing Brian roughly by the wrist and pulling him out of the studio. Every eye was still on Mick, who was massaging his jaw softly and looking back at all the gazes with embarrassment written all over his face. A silence lasted a minute before Mick quickly left as well, not knowing what to say, or how to explain what had happened without properly breaking up the entire band. 

Keith paced quickly back and forth, his breath coming out quick and short and angry as Brian stared up at him nervously from the bed. This went on for a while before Keith abruptly stopped, looking at Brian with a thought clearly written on his face and a smile, getting on his knees between his legs and cupping both of Brian’s cheeks, looking up at him excitedly even though tears still lined his eyes. “Let’s run away together. Now, I mean right now. Leave all this band bullshit behind and go somewhere beautiful. Anywhere we want to go, Brian, just you and me!” He said breathlessly and smiled, kissing him softly before Brian pulled away.   
“Keith, come on… don’t be silly.” He said slowly, hurt immediately filling Keith’s face again. Brian sighed, “I like what we have going here. I love it. But that’s just crazy talk. This band means to world to me, to both of us. We’re doing so well Keith. This is our passion. We can’t just up and leave over some crazy idea.”  
Keith shook his head rapidly, “God dammit, Brian.” He muttered, grabbing him by the shoulders and shaking him. “This isn’t some crazy idea, this is something we could do, right the fuck now! Think how good it could be, Bri, think… I think… that I’m in love with you.” He said slowly, his voice getting quieter with each word. “I think I’m in love with you.” He repeated, just to hear himself say it. 

Brian’s face dropped before a melancholy smile etched its way across his lips. He sighed deeply and cupped Keith’s cheek, rubbing it with his thumb softly before moving and standing up. “Keith, you know I adore you… but I’m not leaving this band. We’re in this together. We get the best of both worlds, Keith, the band and each other.” He left the room without another word, leaving Keith alone in his room to scream in his pillow and cry, a very rare occasion for Keith. 

The tension between Mick and Keith was palpable each time they were even in the same room. Constant glares, passive aggressive remarks and eye rolls being thrown at each other. Mick’s jaw was still slightly bruised and sore. Brian has distanced himself from both the boys for the time being, knowing both of them were a bit torn up, figuring it was better to stay away and let them deal with it. 

After a day full of bickering and sarcastic comments, enough had been enough. “Alright, if you’re both quite fucking done, I’ve had it.” Andrew Oldham snapped, grabbing Keith and Mick by the arm and pulling them to the kitchen, stopping outside the door with them. “Listen, you’re doing great cover versions, and the records are selling, but we need material, and we need it now.” And with one push, Mick and Keith stumbled into the kitchen, Andrew slamming the door behind them, the click of the lock sounding. “Don’t come out until you’ve got a song!” He yelled through the door, leaving behind a pleading Mick and Keith. 

Once they’d given up begging and resorted to sitting on the floor, a silence filled the room. Mick was the first one to speak up. “Listen, Keith… I don’t know what to say. I’m genuinely so, so sorry for what I did. I know you were really into Brian, and… I just felt left out, you know? I felt jealous.”  
Keith shook his head and sighed, “Look, I’m sorry too. I didn’t mean to be such a right bastard lately, I just… I just really fell into it with Brian. But I placed all the blame on you and none on him. It was his problem too.” He said, with sadness practically dripping from his voice. 

“Man, I… I really think I love him.”   
Mick looked up and him and nodded knowingly, “Yeah… Yeah, I think I do too.” He laughed half-heartedly, Keith giving him a half smile.   
A silence took over again for a minute before Mick slowly, even nervously opened his mouth. “Smiling faces I can see, but not for me…” He sang quietly.   
They shared a knowing, somber smile before Keith sighed, grabbing a pen and notebook from the drawer.

"I sit and watch as tears go by."

**Author's Note:**

> I figured this would kind of explain why Keith and Mick treated Brian so poorly in their days as a band and why they’re still quite bitter about him today. I hope you liked it!


End file.
